I believe that God wants every Christian man to be sexually successful. He desires all of us to enter into the holy of holies where spirit, soul and body intimacy occurs with your wife on a regular basis. His desire is to equip each one of us with the skills to be spiritually and emotionally intimate outside of the bedroom so that we can be sexually successful inside of the bedroom.

Are you wondering what a sexually successful man is and how you can become one? I am asked this question, along with many others, when I tell people that I am writing a book about men experiencing successful sexuality.

Let me be perfectly clear. Sex is by far one of God's best ideas! Don't you agree? I imagine the Creator could have made procreation a behavior that brought little pleasure and only engaged our bodies, completely detached from the wealth of a soul and spirit experience. What a bummer sex would have been if that were the case.

Thankfully our Maker decided to be very creative concerning our sexuality. Not only does your body go through the greatest physiological changes, but when engaging successfully in sex you also experience the highest chemical reward possible for your body.

As a therapist, I have counseled with thousands of men regarding sexuality issues. During this time, I have learned that many men are not sexually successful. I have "clocked in" years of my life listening to men as they share varied stories of their lack of sexual success. These men and their wives want to be sexually successful, but even after several decades of marriage, they have not achieved sexual success.

Why haven't many men experienced sexual success? Although there are different answers to that question, there are several broad sexual deficits that have commonality among many men.

The first deficit stems from the fact that many men have never received reliable information about true sexuality from their fathers. While traveling the country speaking at men's conferences, I often ask men how long their sex talk with their fathers lasted. Over 95 percent of the men questioned stated that it was less than three minutes long. You can understand how such a deficit of information from a sexual expert--your dad--would force you to launch your own quest to discover successful sexuality.

The second-largest deficit perpetrating the lack of sexual success is the source from which most young men acquire their sexual information. For boys fourteen to sixteen years of age their main source for sexual information is usually other fourteen- to sixteen-year-old boys. They may never have had sex, but they lie about that also. For many young men today, pornographic literature, the mainstream media, prime-time sitcoms, movies, magazines and, more recently, the Internet are primary sources for learning about sexuality.

The good news is that regardless of whatever deficit of information you have suffered in your past, you can have a phenomenal three-dimensional sex life that will reach a plane of sexual success and satisfaction you never thought possible.

Like many men, I was misinformed early on about sexuality, and I had experiences that could have kept me from sexual success. But I kept searching until I found the information that we must have in order to become sexually successful and to maintain that success throughout life!

On the following pages you will be exposed to principles and information that can bring you to sexual success. Once you experience sexuality as God intended it, you will never be able to settle for less again--I guarantee it! It is an incredible journey that offers awesome rewards.

This journey, which I call Sex, Men and God, involves a process--there is no magic bullet. If you choose the process, ahead of you lies a journey during which equipping, informing and for many, healing will take place. When you reach the end of this journey you will be a sexually successful man who can be fearless in prayer, a threat to the enemy of our souls and a spiritual blessing to your wife, family, church and community.

During our journey to successful sexuality, we will travel through many difficult areas and visit many facets of male sexuality. In order to navigate effectively these difficult areas and successfully reach our journey's end, we need to remember that all of our discussion involves God's divine design for men. God's gift to men is our sexuality. It is a divine gift that we have from birth to death. Yet, as men, we are misunderstood many times because of our God-given desire to consummate our marriage regularly.

I also believe that when men appropriately understand their sexuality they will experience three-dimensional sexuality that is wonderful and productive. The ability to connect with your spouse in three God-given dimensions--spirit, soul and body--can satisfy you so profoundly that you do not even desire sex the next day. Imagine being that sexually satiated on a regular basis; that is sexual success!

Realizing the value of your sexuality will help you avoid the pitfalls of misusing it--pitfalls that result in damaging yourself, your relationship with God and even future generations. That is why we have presented these chapters in Sex, Men and God to address the many magnificent facets of our sexuality--to give you the keys to understanding the value of your sexuality.

The enemy of our soul has concentrated his attacks against God's gift of male sexuality. He is fully aware that this gift, if misunderstood or misused, can lead to consequences that extend through family lines for generations to come. Likewise, God knows the blessing of a man of God who understands his sexuality and submits it to the lordship of Christ. The blessing of a sexually healthy man also impacts his sons and daughters for generations.

God's gift to men is our sexuality.

Understanding that male sexuality is god's great design can motivate every man to exert whatever effort is required to complete his personal journey to sexual success. God offers to every man who chooses to complete this journey the wonderful reward of sexual success. Perhaps you are not sure yet what that goal looks like. You are about to discover God's gift to you from His perspective.

Pt I. - Why haven't men experienced sexual success?
Pt II. - God is against us hurting ourselves by misusing the gift of sexuality.
Pt III. - Five things you need to know if you want to get free--and stay free--from lust.